借张惠妹的歌, 谈谈自己对“来世”的感想。
从小就听父母说要好好修行，积德，往后才得以升至“极乐世界”， 或是这个天，那个天， 什么来着。
基督徒的朋友们也常说，要相信主， 归于主， 死后才能升到天堂去。
说真的，我对这一切，都满抗拒的。 并非想入地狱，但对于天堂，也没有憧憬。
死后，就不能是 ”无“ 吗？Nothingness. Poof. 就这样从所有的空间蒸发。什么都不想要，哪都不想去。
并不是消极，悲观。 只是觉得把希望寄托在 “来世”，并以“积德”，“信念” 来换取各个天国的“入门券”，是一种变相的追求。和追求人间的种种，真的有那么大的区别吗？
（我指的 “来世”， 并不局限于六道轮回。就算超脱了轮回，没有了实质的存在，精神还是存在着的，也是 "a form of existence", 对吗？）
*仍在沉思中*
- spending some quality time with the Mister (after yet another week of constant OT)
- sleeping in till 10.30am! *snuggle closer to my beloved stinkilicious bolster*
- savouring yummy ice-cream flavours and teasing a goldfish gaping at us from his tank with a spatula-ful of the delicious stuff ("Hey fishy-fishy-fishy, want some?")
- a new handphone that reminds me of Paddington Bear, Mini Coopers and ang-ku-kuehs. :heart:
Sanity is about three weeks away. I can't wait!
But I know I'll somehow miss this state of madness, somewhere in the depths of my dreams.
I was pretty peeved today at how closed some people's minds were - how judgemental they were being just because others were not part of their pack. "I can't stand these petty lil' people", I thought to myself. But soon after that thought flashed through my mind, I realised I was being equally judgemental. I'm the pot here, calling the kettle black. Everything is relative - closed vs open, generous vs petty. Why should I judge?
But taking this "Zen" stand feels uncomfortable sometimes, like sitting on the fence not because I like sitting on it, but because I lack the courage to fall off either side. Like I'm a wimp who can't make up my mind, you know?
Of course, wimpishness isn't the true spirit of Zen. I'm just not enlightened enough to get it right.
Another boat has come my way this week but I'm going to say no again. While I'm sorely tempted to seize this ticket out of misery, alarm bells are ringing at the back of my head. I'm not sure what's triggering the alarm, but I'm going to follow my gut feeling. Better stranded on a deserted island than to end up with Captain Hook and his crew, right?
So, for now, it's back to watching the horizon.
Didn't work this weekend - didn't pop by the office, didn't bring work home. For the first time in a month, I had the whole weekend to myself and I spent it bummin' around, most joyfully. Watched loads of TV/DVDs, caught up on some sleep, and spent quality time with the mister, finally. Even doing housework was therapeutic, fancy that. Liberation in finally being able to mop the floor and smell that lavender in the floor detergent! My life is complete. *grin*
